Knock jokes
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
It’s the police, ma’am, your son got hit by a drunken driver. He’s dead.
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your dad.
But my dad's dead.
I know, just reminding you!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Utah.
Utah who?
You're talking to me.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Cabbage.
Cabbage who?
Cabbage doesn’t have a last name.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Broccoli.
Broccoli who?
Broccoli hasn’t got a surname!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Goliath.
Goliath who?
I need to Goliath down and sleep!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ach.
Ach who?
Bless you!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My name is Ya.
Ya who?
Yahooooo!!!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ruff ruff.
Ruff ruff who?
Let the dogs out.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Nonye.
Nonye who?
Nonye buisness.
Why'd the girl fall off the swing?
'Cause she had no arms.
Knock, knock!! Who's there?
Not the girl.
Me: Knock knock. Bestie: Who's there? Me: Ben. Bestie: Ben Dover? Me: No, Ben vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx. Bestie: Omg how did I forget, hi vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Island.
Island who?
Island the one that knows you!
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock." "Who?" "Knock, knock you."
Knock knock.
Knock knock... Who's there? Surprise! Surprise who? Surprise, mother fucker!
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"