Women should be allowed to leave the kitchen......to clean the rest of the house
I like my bread how I like my wife: cold and stiff
Julius Caesar is Roman? More like romaine (salad) and to make the best salad you stab it 23 times until the CAESAR salad, Romaine Salad, is fresh.
There was a dude. He had a mondo dong. His wife was like, yo, where are your balls? The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies "i knew those meatballs tasted weird!"
How many line cooks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three. One to do it, and two to say that they did it better at the previous restaurant they were at.
I'm like a broken refrigerator, cool but broken inside
i told my mum the refrigerator was running so she got dressed and ran after it...
How do you fit a baby in a bowl... a blender... and how do you get it out?
Tortilla chips
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove
Men: get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich! Women: go chop some lumber! White people: get back into the cotton fields!
The other day my wife said "take me someplace I have never been before, I said why don't you try the kitchen! "
Say toast 3 times. Spell toast 3 times. What do you put in a toaster. What is the answer.
It was 7:00am when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep, he got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat, "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely, Billy replied with "whatever dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"
grandfathers last words :Stop shaking the ladder you cunt Grandmother last words : you know how to use that hammer Dads last words : Always aim before you shoot that gun Moms last words :Turn of the stove when you're done My last thought : am I a murder
today i saw my son lick out a tub of butter, i told him to make a sandwitch without butter for a week (as a punishment) he said 'ok' and licked the bread. 'it's really easy to spread' he said. LOL!
bitch wanna make me a sandwich?
If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it?
The man, because he shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course as long as you change the olive oil.
Where did the cake 🥞 sleep 💤 on the stove? In a pan.
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, "Hello," as if the psycho will answer, "Hey, what's up, I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"
