Men: get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich! Women: go chop some lumber! White people: get back into the cotton fields!
The other day my wife said "take me someplace I have never been before, I said why don't you try the kitchen! "
Say toast 3 times. Spell toast 3 times. What do you put in a toaster. What is the answer.
It was 7:00am when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep, he got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat, "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely, Billy replied with "whatever dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"
Grandfather's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
Grandmother's last words: "You know how to use that hammer."
Dad's last words: "Always aim before you shoot that gun."
Mom's last words: "Turn off the stove when you're done."
My last thought: Am I a murderer?
today i saw my son lick out a tub of butter, i told him to make a sandwitch without butter for a week (as a punishment) he said 'ok' and licked the bread. 'it's really easy to spread' he said. LOL!
bitch wanna make me a sandwich?
If a man drove over a woman, whose fault was it?
The man, because he shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course as long as you change the olive oil.
Where did the cake 🥞 sleep 💤 on the stove? In a pan.
I love how in horror movies the person calls out, "Hello," as if the psycho will answer, "Hey, what's up? I'm in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?"
I like to eat moms spaghetti now try it with the NEWWWW VEGETTIIII, turn any vegetable into pasta
Why did the tomato go red because it saw salad dressing
What is the one thing wrong with Asian pet stores... There is always a kitchen in the back
Why did the chef cook his eggs on the golf course? Because he wanted them par-boiled!
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass? A baby in the microwave
"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie looking out of the kitchen window "I know," said her mother "I've just stepped in a poodle!"
Yesterday my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. I told her that, as a punishment, she won't eat butter for 1 month.
Today I saw her killing a cockroach in the kitchen. I told her "nice try".
What did the egg say to the blender? Nothing It"s an egg joke
Why did the chef flip a pancake? Because he was a tosser
