King jokes
Why are Nepalese 馃嚦馃嚨 bad at chess?
Because someone already killed their 馃憫.
Where did the king put his armies?
In his sleevies.
The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!
I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I鈥檓 joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
What did kings say when they were made king?
Allah ail (All hail) [insert name here]!
Simba was walking too slow so I told him to Mufasa.
Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the kings horses and all the kings men, said "Fuck him, he's only an egg."
It would have been better if Martin Luther King didn鈥檛 have a dream.
You know, for his sake.
Why did Dairy Queen and Burger King get arrested for copyright infringement? Because they gave birth to Five Guys.
So you know "The Lion King."
Do you remember Simba?
Well, his dad is really strong, and he walks really fast, but Simba walks really slow.
So I told him to Mufasa.
Why are Americans bad at chess?
Because they lost two towers.
You know what the yin and yang looked like before Martin Luther King Jr.?
There was none, it was all white!
In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.
I mean, I don't see why not.
Yo mama's so fat, her pad is a king-size mattress.
One knight, a king, and a queen went fishing. They each caught one fish, so how did three fish end up in the bucket?
One "knight"!!!
The king took a shit on the craps table at the casino.
Where do the Borg eat fast food?
Borger King.
Why is Chloe's forehead so big? Because her forehead is king-size.
What is a king's favorite sized candy? King-sized candy!