Kids jokes
When a kid says, "I'm a pedophile," it means that he has a crush on one of his classmates.
When an adult says it, he is accused as a rapper.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
What is the best shield to use during a battle? The emo kid.
Kid: Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
Nerd: Because they're marsupials.
Kid: No, because they didn’t have the koala-fication!
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
Why did Michael Jackson divorce LMP? She didn't want to give him kids.
What game do emo kids hate the most?
Life.
The kid that died is cut in half, and you see the next trap. It looks like a giant pit that you have to jump over, and you clear it, but you feel something on your back, and you realize that there is a spike that comes up when you jump over. You see the other contestant jump over. You try to warn them to not step over because they would get stabbed, but they ignore you and then get hit by the spike. The next obstacle is a wall that slams on a wall. You wait until the wall closes, and you quickly run through. The next person runs through, and they get to live.
Sorry, this is small. This is also a part two.
A kid had school today.
He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)
*School Shooter Walks In*
That one kid who plays "Pumped Up Kicks" at max volume.
Why is a ketchup bottle like a kid? Cause they're like, "Squirt!" (squirt ketchup).
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull in a children's play area.
Jack and Jill wanted some pills.
So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.
I told a kid in a wheelchair that he should use his rocket league booster.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
What's an emo kid's favorite movie?
Suicide Squad.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."