Kids Jokes

Down Syndrome

I met a kid with Down syndrome the other day. He told me he was into rock music. He told me his favorite song was "Down With The Syndrome." Kinda drooled while attempting to sing it.

Face

Jared from Subway. Remember kids, "tuna sub" backwards is what I'm going to do on your face.

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  • Drug

    Say no to drugs, kids. Suddenly, the poster disappeared. I hallucinated. Must have been the cocaine.

    Drug

    What's the difference between kids and drugs? I don't sell drugs.

    Kid

    I threw a paralyzed kid into the fireplace and called him hotwheels.

    High-five

    Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree?

    A: It left him/her/them hanging.

    Kid

    I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.

    Rape

    So, I was raping this girl the other night, and she said, "Please just think of my kids!" I was like, "What a freak."

    Adoption

    A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”

    Chemo

    What do you call a movie with kids with cancer? ... Finding Chemo.

    Orphanage

    Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.

    Suicide

    The depressed kid wanted a high-five from the tree, but it left him hangin'.

    Suicide

    It's funny how teachers are supposed to educate new lives, but only teach certain kids how much they want to commit suicide and how many ways there are.