Kids jokes

What do you call an autistic kid if he was short?

A short tistic.

Dumb kid: What does homework mean?

Teacher: J0K35? (J0K35 is me btw) can you explain to DK what homework means, please?

Me:

"Half Of My Existence Wasted On Random Knowledge"

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because these jokes are not funny.

Here's why the chicken crossed the road...

The chicken was on the run from a crazy-ass butcher ready to murder the poor thing, so the chicken crossed the road. The chicken was crossing the road, then a blind kid saw the chicken, and the kid was hit by a flying rock, his vision was blurred (what vision?) and was actually cured of the blind. The chicken ran and jumped into a truck's opening and was never seen again... The kid got up from the ground and looked at the road, to see the chicken was not there, and said..." The chicken crossed the road...." The kid yelled at everyone about the chicken crossing the road and got a lot of positive attention. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Reddit were full of the chicken nonsense and gained widespread attention from N.A to Asia in only 1 day.

The butcher was arrested for the attempted murder of a joke animal and was sentenced to over 20 years in solitary confinement, and a few weeks later, the sentence was moved to a life sentence, and the butcher became known as The ChicKiller.

The End (hope you enjoyed, I was bored so I made this shit...)

What’s the similarity between a penis and a lollipop?

Kids can take both.

How are rape and airplanes similar?

The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.

Me: Says to kid at adoption center, "You're adopted!"

Me and kid: hug.

Thought this site needed a little bit of nice jokes.

What’s yellow and can’t swim?

A bus full of kids.

Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?

Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.

So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.

Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.

What do you call an autistic kid with a minigun?

Special forces.

Here’s what I did to the kids at the orphanage. I dropkicked 12, lit 10 on fire, comboed 9, punched 3, and murdered 1.

What do you call a wheelchair kid that is on fire?

Hot Wheels.

I saw a kid on the curb. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at the orphanage!

So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!

What does a middle aged man live in?

A retarded kid he keeps in the van.

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair going through a fire? Ghost Rider.

One time I saw a kid crying, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working at an orphanage!

I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hairdryer.

Why did the fire not burn the kid? Because it had no lips.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special forces.