Kids jokes

Why can’t orphanage kids play baseball?

Cause they don’t know where home is.

Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.

A pedo is driving down a highway really slowly and gets stopped by the police. The officer asks why he was driving so slowly. The man answers, "I don't wake up the kids."

Papyrus: I hate you, Frisk.

Frisk: This is why Mettaton doesn't fucking love you.

Sans: Kid, I will kill you.

Papyrus: (Remembers something) That's why you don't have a lover, you lonely giraffe!

Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.

Man: Could you hold this for me?

Kid: Ok mister! I love playing with a pew pew! Pow! Pew! Pew! Bang! *GUNSHOT*

Man: Dammit, now who am I gonna put in the van?!

What game do emo kids hate the most?

Life.

Which falls faster, an apple or an emo kid?

The apple, because the emo kid is hanging.

How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special forces.

Why did the legless kid think he won a race? Because everybody already left.

What does a kid with cancer and dark humor have in common? They never get old.

Why did the emo kid get kicked out of the amusement park?

He kept cutting in line.

What did the parent say to M.J.?

"Get off my kid!"

Stevie Wonder is a terrible father.

He never sees his kids.

My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire

Which one fell first?

The depressed kid or the feather? Look at 1st comment to see answer.

What do Ben 10 and a disabled kid have in common? They both slap their wrist.

I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!