Kids jokes

Yesterday I had a party in my basement.

I got questioned a lot about 5 dead kids in the corner shut in a box. I did that when I was 13, damn I forgot about them!

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.

Why have kids? Just go get one now, no nine-month delay.

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

Get off of here, kids!

Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"

August 2020: LeafyIsHere gets terminated on Youtube for harassing Pokimane.

Billy, a toxic kid in Leafy's fanbase: "Imane's life is a joke, that's why I call her Jokeimane."

A person who simps for Pokimane: "And you look like you came from a farm, Hillbilly."

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Why do dead babies cry? Just kidding, they are dead.

Silence is golden. Unless you have kids, then silence is suspicious.

Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?

Because they don't have a Father's Day.

Why do so many kids love boomerangs? Because they always come back.

Why do some kids have water with their cereal?

Because their dad never came back with the milk.

What are emo kids' least favorite lollies?

Life Savers.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Answer: Special forces.

Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?

Kid: Why?

Man: 'Cause they have a family plan.

Kid: Oh, then I need to switch phone services then.

Man: Why?

Kid: I'm an orphan.

Man: *laughs out loud* That's tough!

(You can tell the joke shortened by saying, "Why can't an orphan use Verizon? 'Cause they have a family plan.")

I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"

You'd think with Jason being a pastor's kid, his parents would have gotten him Invisalign.

And an exorcism.

I got hired to work as a camp counselor for kids with ADHD, but I got fired. I guess I shouldn't have introduced myself with "Welcome to concentration camp".

Where do religious kids practice sports?

In the prayground.