Kid jokes

When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.

But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!

How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?

He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.

What does gum in my d*ck have in common?

Both get chewed on by little kids.

I gave a blind kid a hand grenade and told him it's a beyblade.

This dad went out hunting, he killed a deer. He came home and he and his wife decided to have it for dinner but not tell their kids. Instead, they made them guess. The dad said, "It's something that daddy calls mommy." The little girl yells to her brother, "Don't eat it! It's an ass!"

How many kids does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw them. 😂😂😂😂

If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.

If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.

Hello guys, imagine if we had no school and we get to do whatever we want without parents telling us what to do! What place would you want to call it and what would the fun things we get to do be? I would call it "Happy world for kids." Leave a comment telling me what it would be called! Enjoy! :)

What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.

I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.

Man: Hey kids, who wants milk?

Kids: Me!

Man: *unzips fly*

What's the number 1 cause of pedophilia?

Sexy kids.

Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”

Kid: “Whatever!”

Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”

Kid: “Doesn't matter!”

Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”

Kid: “Oh well!”

Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”

Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”

Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?

To get them into his van.

Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?

Kid: AK!

Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾‍♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿‍♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻

Wanna hear a joke? My life! Hahahah! Just kidding, jokes actually mean something...

Why did the kid with Down syndrome get expelled?

He was always tardy.

All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.

What's that? said the orphans.

Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.

What's the IJK?

I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Mom: Can I tell you a joke?

Kid: Sure.

Mom: Knock knock.

Kid: Who's there?

Mom: Not yo.

Kid: Not yo who?

Mom: Not yo father.

Kid: Not yo husband either.

What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?

They both shoot when they see kids.