Jump jokes
Me and my friends jumped some orphans. Who will they tell? Their parents?
My wife is so fat. She jumped up in the air and got stuck.
"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.
So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"
How do you get a depressed person to jump?
Put them on a bridge.
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
"Dream, yo mama so ugly, when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out!"
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.
Is laughing a problem?
Laughing at what?
I want to jump.
Jump—what?
Jump off the hook.
What do you say to a guy with Down syndrome who’s on top of a sky scraper? "Jump!"
How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed? Put velcro on the ceiling.
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
What in the world jumps the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
When Peter Pan jumped off the Twin Towers, what happened? He Neverland.
Mother: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you follow?
Me: Leads a marching parade off the Golden Gate Bridge.
Mum: If your friend jumped off a cliff, would you?
Me: Oh yeah, no doubt my friend wouldn't even have to jump first.
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
If I'm still single by Christmas, Santa won't be the only one jumping off a roof.
Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.