My depressed friend said he wanted to jump off of a bridge but he didn’t wanna commit suicide. I told him if you jump and yell "parkour," it’ll just be a failed stunt.
Yo mama so fat, when she jumped, I didn’t laugh, but the floor cracked up.
Fat kid jumps in the pool.
The popular girl: "I thought there was going to be a tsunami."
The fat kid: "I thought trash was not supposed to be in the ocean."
People ask me if my friend jumps off a bridge, will I go as well? Of course not. I am a leader; I will go first, my friend will jump after me!
Who says white people can't jump?
Have you seen the 911 footage?
Once I was riding my bike and saw a $5. I jumped off and died.
Yo mama is so fat, she jumped on a trampoline and she broke it.
Why is the record for longest jump kept by an emo?
They're still hanging.
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
Me and my friends jumped some orphans. Who will they tell? Their parents?
My wife is so fat. She jumped up in the air and got stuck.
"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.
So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"
How do you get a depressed person to jump?
Put them on a bridge.
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
You're so skinny, when you did your first jump on a pogo stick you would never come back.
"Dream, yo mama so ugly, when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out!"
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.
Is laughing a problem?
Laughing at what?
I want to jump.
Jump—what?
Jump off the hook.
