Joke jokes
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
At what point does a joke become a dad joke?
When it disappears and never returns home.
Why did the egg hide?
Because it was a little chicken!
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
There is a joke that did not enter this page... Why? She is afraid they will laugh at her!
Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”
Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”
When I was recently standing in front of a huge puddle with my buddy, I remembered how he tricked me a week ago. So I tricked him...
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
What’s the only plus for someone who burns to death?
They get a discount at the crematorium.
Q. Why aren't midget jokes funny?
A. They always seem to punch down.
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
Stop with the emojis. They kinda just make the joke cringy. For example: How many ppl 🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷 does it take to have 🥒🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑???? Well, it takes at least 1 🤷 and 1 👰 and they make a perfect ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤. See how cringy it is. I mean sure, it's a dumb example, but still, just at least less emojis.
Did you try the digital egg padlock? Because it is very easy to crack the code.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite type of candy?
A: Loli-pops.
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."