Joke jokes
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
I would say a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't land well.
What did the big tree say to the little one? Grow a pear!
I got kicked out of the hospital because I told all the Covid-19 patients to stay positive.
The patient said, "When will this be over?"
The doctor said, "After you die."
The patient says, "Was that a morbid joke?"
The doctor says, "Well, um, actually, you'll die because we broke the needles and the cure."
The patient says, "Well, it's a bright day, maybe if you weren't clumsy!"
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.
Jokes are like food, not everyone has it.
SCP-173 has breached containment. This is not a joke. Multiple Keter class SCPs have breached containment. This is an XK class event. Evacuate the Earth and solar system. The world is ending!
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
Son: Mom, can I tell you something?
Mom: Yes, of course, honey, what's up?
Son: Ok, you have terrible jokes! They're not even funny!
Mom: Well, I made you.
Why were the apple and orange all alone? Because the banana "split."
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
I sat down and wrote a joke.
What do you call a banana that peels itself?
Appealing!
When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"
What's a woodpecker's favorite kind of jokes?
Knock knock ones.
What do you call a bad piece of wood? Knotty.
I sit because I can't stand you.