Joke jokes
Mom, shut up. Me? I don't shut up, I grow up. When I look at you, I throw up.
Jokes about menstruation are never funny, period!
(Pick-up line) If your tits are the Twin Towers... can I be your Osama?
How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.
I saw a kid wearing tatty rags on a curb, so I asked, "Are you an orphan?"
"Yes," he replied. "What gave me away?" He asked, "Your parents," I said.
What did the father name his daughter with no legs?
Peggy.
What’s 1+1?? The number of parents orphans don’t have!
Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.
Many were curious about how methane ended up on Mars.
I'm pretty sure it was because of Uranus.
Funny how "Hawking" rhymes with "talking" and "walking," and he can't do either.
And the first four letters of his Christian name spell "step," and he also can't do that.
Where did Suzy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
What do you call a flat-chested depressed person?
A cutting board.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
Worst jokes ever? More like I killed an old man in 2012 in Oklahoma City at that nasty Red Lobster, not the one near the freeway, and hid the body in a creek!
What do you call a dinosaur with a butt?
A Butt-asaurus.
A kid went to visit his bully, and he says, "How's your face?" The kid says, "How's your parents?" and proceeds to walk out of the orphanage.
I made a website about orphans.
It didn’t have a home page!
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and called it "Hot Wheels."