Joke jokes
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
I'm gay, lol.
What is the difference between a retard and a zombie anyway?
They’re always hungry and shuffle around aimlessly, moaning... Oh, and it takes a bullet in the forehead to put them both down.
Uh!!!
What do you call a blonde who's dyed her hair brunette?
Artificial intelligence.
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?
I'm sure you would run away if your name was kjdhfkuaysbgfbkuejgf.
What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?
A yeast infection.
I had a friend who got shot in the head.
Guess you could say he was...
Blown Away!
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
Two WiFi routers got married. The ceremony was OK, but the reception was amazing.
I had a conversation with a Möbius strip.
It was one-sided.
Why do orphans go to church?
They go there to finally call someone "father."
Q: Why didn't the skeleton laugh at the joke?
A: He broke his funny bone!
What music scares balloons?
Pop music.
Why would the banana scream "ouch?"
Because it is getting peeled.
What do turtles use to communicate?
A shellphone!
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
You guys wanna hear a joke?
My LOVE LIFE.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
Those t.p. jokes are getting shittier by the second.
What did the letter A say to the letter B?
"Z" you later.
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."