Joke jokes
What's the difference between Clark Kent and chicken noodle?
One is Super. The other is just soup.
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?
Just hang in there, man.
Why did the squirrel swim on his back?
To keep his nuts dry.
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it's too cheesy.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
"Cummy Beynis. Hahaha?"
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Dooris." "Dooris who?" "Door is locked, that's why I'm knocking!"
Wanna hear a joke...
I don't know, I'm too high.
I can’t help you find orphan jokes. Maybe ask their family.
What type of horse can jump higher than a house?
All houses can't jump.
What do cannibals call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Surprise.
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side.
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
I don't know, I don't have one.