Joke jokes
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
Today I asked my best friend what their favorite joke was. They started waving their hands around, and I thought it was a sign to go, thinking I had offended them or something. Turns out they were mute...
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
I thought about making a necrophilia joke, but I knew it would be a DOA.
I should probably stop making jokes about bulimia. They just leave a bad taste in my mouth.
I wonder if any of these people are still alive.
Anyways,
When I arrived at the pearly gates when I died, the guardian asked me how I died. I told him I was just hanging around.
What do orphans have in common with stray dogs?
Nothing, they are both orphans.
When people tell me to "go to hell," I tell them their address.
What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
Why does the orphan kid eat cereal with water?
Because his dad hasn’t come back with the milk yet.
I would have a joke for my friend... but he can't afford the punchline.
Q. What hits the ground first when falling out of a tree, a leaf or an emo kid? A. A leaf. There is usually a rope to stop the emo kid.
Q. Why didn't Tracy Latimer enjoy her trip to Vancouver?
A. She had to go to GasTown.
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
My doctor said I need to lose calories, so I got a piece of paper, wrote "calories," and lit it on fire.
What is a joke that will never end even though you want it to?
For me, life.