Joke jokes
Sans: “pokes brother with ruler”
Papyrus: Sans, what are you doing?
Sans: Measuring your patience.
Papyrus: Grunts
Orphan jokes protest. Anonymous.
Orphan jokes are just funny so stop trying to ruin our fun!
Comments:
Gwen: Stop! It is not funny. Orphans are just out their cold, weak, and need someone! And the jokes are not funny!
Shut up: Shut up!
Liv: Gwen stop!!
Gwen: SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!!!!
Today, there was a big test for Little Timmy. During the test, Timmy had to take a really huge shit. So, he rushed to the bathroom. He took a while in there.
When he was done, he realized there was no more toilet paper left. Since there was nothing around him to use, the only thing he could do was wipe with his hand. His time in the bathroom was up, and he needed to finish that test! He didn’t have time to wash his hands. So, he hurried back. The problem was, the hand he wiped with was his right hand. He used his left hand to complete the test, which made him fail. When he got home, his mother was standing there crossing her arms. “Timmy, the teacher had called and said you wrote sloppy on your test. Why is that?” Timmy replied, “Oh, it’s because I caught a leprechaun with my right hand, but if I opened it, my classmates would scare him away, so I had to use my left.” Timmy’s mother glared at him with disbelief. “Timmy, I don’t believe you. Now open your hand!” Timmy did so and opened his hand. “See, mother? I said you’d scare the shit out of him!”
What is the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 was a 6 offender.
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
What did the kid with Down syndrome say to his friend?
Nothing, he had no friends.
I’d make a rape joke, but I don't wanna force that on you too.
Why is the bald eagle bald?
Because it has no hair.
It has feathers. LOL.
What is the difference between me and Paul Walker?
I’ve watched Fast and Furious Seven.
Why do you Scotchmen wear kilts?
Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
What is the difference between runners and my car?
My car is still running.
What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
Alien vs. Predator.
What did the Japanese man say to his friend after he killed somebody?
"That is very Wong."
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?
The dead hang.
What did the blind man say the first time he touched sandpaper?
“What in the world did I just read?”
What did the cannibal say when his friend fell on the floor?
"5 second rule!"
Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump?
Because orange is the new black.