Joke jokes
What did Stephen Hawking see before he died?
The blue screen of death.
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One is dangerous for kids if put on their face, the other one is used to carry groceries.
What’s the difference between outlaws and orphans?
At least outlaws are wanted.
Why'd the girl fall off the swing?
'Cause she had no arms.
Knock, knock!! Who's there?
Not the girl.
Why did I trip over your foot?
Because you were so short I couldn’t see you!
She responds: “See that man over there with no arms? Tell him to clap.”
The kid replies: “But, Mom, I’m blind!”
Mom: “Exactly.”
Yo mama so big, her belt size said "equator."
What do you call a transgender person in a wheelchair?
An Autobot.
That shirt's very becoming on you.
If I were on you, I’d be coming too.
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
What do you call an Asian that was born too early?
Wong Tai Ming.
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.
Oh wait, I'm thinking of...
What did the Indian say when he bumped into someone else?
"Sari."
What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and a book?
A book has papers.
What’s the difference between Kendrick Lamar and an orphan?
He has family ties.
My friend Josh made a joke about Liam's hairline, even though his ears are so big and his face looks like a monkey... if they were white.
When my bro says "YOUR MOM" when I'm talking when I'm at school, and my friend says "YOUR MOM," me punches him;-;