Joke jokes
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
What did the pickle say to his friend Rick?
"We are Pickle Ricks!"
I forgot what a boomerang was. Oh well, it’ll come back to me.
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
What do you tell a suicidal person when they complain about their problems to you?
Just hang in there, man.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they finally have someone to call father.
What’s an emo's favorite singer?
Slash.
Why did the squirrel swim on his back?
To keep his nuts dry.
What do cannibals call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Surprise.
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side.
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
Do you know what is good about being an orphan?
Every candy bar is family sized.
How do you get an emo down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
Why do trees never call Emos? Because they always hang up on them.
Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?
because it was rated RRRRGGGG.
I am guessing you don't understand :(
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
What's the difference between Clark Kent and chicken noodle?
One is Super. The other is just soup.