Joke jokes
Immigration jokes just cross the line.
I was gonna do a school shooter joke, but it was aimed at younger audiences.
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
What did the lungs say to the cigar?
"You take my breath away..."
What does a light bulb and a school shooter have in common?
They both light up the room.
My suicidal friend said he liked trains, so we took him to the tracks.
A cobra once bit Chuck Norris. After hours of agonising pain... it died.
How many kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Apparently not 27. Because my basement's still dark...
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”
He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
Why does the blonde stand in a corner when she's cold?
Because it's 90 degrees.
I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!
I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
What do you call a necrophiliac gangbang?
Cracking open a cold one with the boys.
Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot.
Student: Which end?
Got the George Floyd pack, this shit makin' it hard to breathe.
I got kicked out of the hospital for saying, "Stay Positive," to the corona patients.
I hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though I think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldn't wanna hurt your funny bone, but I think your starting to get BONELY so I'll stop pulling your leg. Now get out before I give you a bad time.
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"