Joke jokes
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.
Why do pizzas not tell jokes?
They're too cheesy.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
The baby cries when I cut it, but an onion makes me cry when I cut it.
"My grandmother used to tell us a joke. She’d say, "Knock knock." We’d say, "Who’s there?" Then she’d say, "I can’t remember"... and start to cry."
What is the email password of a black person?
"watermelon"
Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?
To get them into his van.
What does LGBTQ+ mean? Is it the premium version of GAY?
Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.
(Also, I banged ya mum ;))
Little Jonny just came back from quarantine with his girlfriend, Sally.
They both said they had to go to the bathroom. When they came back, Sally was coughing up a storm. The teacher said, "You need to be quarantined again."
"No," Sally said, "I was just in the bathroom choking on something that grown-ups, especially women, like." Then the teacher faints.
What do you call a rich Chinese person?!? Kaching!
Why did Hitler get hit by a car? Because he did Nazi that coming!
What's black and white and red all over?
A police brutality case.
What kind of sex do priests love?.
Nun.
Joke: Why did the gym close down?
– It just didn’t work out.
What does a broken down vegetable say?
I need new wheels.
There's 3 things I hate.
1. Jokes
2. Lists
3. Irony.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!
Well, being an American is just a joke itself.
Have you seen the Xbox game Sea of Thieves?
Sea if these nuts fit on yo mouth.
What did the 0 say to the 8?
"Nice belt."