Joke jokes
What instrument do a pair of sheep play? The two-baaaa.
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂
An older retired couple - the wife had grown tired of her husband farting in bed each night. One morning she put some chicken parts under the blankets in bed next to him and went off to make some coffee.
A few minutes later she hears a loud fart followed by a blood curdling scream. He comes out after a while and says, "Hon, you were right that I would fart my guts out. Took me the longest to put them back in."
What does milk and a kid with cancer have in common?
An expiration date.
Oh, my fat joke offended you? Which one of your chins did I hurt?
Memes
Why was Hitler bad at math?
He could only count to nein.
I would make a rape joke, but I'd have to force it down your throat.
Doctor: "You're as healthy as a horse!"
Jimmy: "That's great!"
Doctor: "A horse with cancer."
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger lickin' good!
What's sad and has no life? The person reading this.
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
You nail its other hand to the ground.
What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.
I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.
Why can't you kill a depressed person?
Because they are already dead inside.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.
Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.
Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.
So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?
What did Hitler feel about all the jokes about him? Führereous.
What starts with “M” and ends with “arriage”?
Miscarriage.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.