Joke jokes

So, a few hours ago my friend said I need to CUT it out with the s/h jokes... like... it's really not that deep?

Why can't you kill a depressed person?

Because they are already dead inside.

Jon said: What do you call a pregnant woman?

Mike said: I don’t know, what?

Jon said: Kinder surprise.

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer. I'm not too worried, I think she's joking.

Once there was a girl named Sally! She had no arms or legs, was mute, deaf, and blind.

Knock knock Who’s there? Not Sally.

I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.

Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?

Other person: Yes.

Sorry, I'm still working on it! 😅

Q: Why couldn't the bicycle stand up?

A: Because it was too tired!! 😴😴😴

I entered 10 puns into a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.

What's red and really bad for your teeth? A brick.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Apaches.

Apaches who?

Apaches on your eye.

What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine. But why did seven eat nine? Because seven knew you had to have three squared meals a day.

What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false?

What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.

Americans when they think they have the best offensive British jokes: "we threw your tea in the ocean." 💀

British people making offensive jokes about America: "our towers didn’t explode."😎

What's the difference between necrophilia and a choking fetish? 15 seconds.

Someone at school judged my grammar.

I judged theirs by the terms "school" and "rifle range" being mixed up the next day.

I was always poked and told at weddings your next...

So I went to funerals and poked them and said your next.....

I forgot the joke.