Joke jokes

April Fool's joke: Go to an orphanage and tell them, "Their parents came back."

Yes, I'm CUTE.

C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty.

A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."

"Knock knock."

Orphan: "Who's there?"

"Not your parents."

What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.

Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.

What do you call a man off the ground?

Hanged.

"Would you like to play the rape game?"

"No wtf" she replied.

"That's the spirit!"

How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?

They never get old.

What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes.

I don't like to use the word "kidnapping". So I just use the term: "surprise adoption."

Chuck Norris would have died a couple of years ago, but death hasn't built up the courage to tell him.

So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."

Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.

What starts with M and ends with arriage?

Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?

Neither does the child.

What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?

They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.

What is an orphan's family portrait called?

A self-portrait.

You travel to the past into the era where Julius Caesar is still alive. He thinks you may be from the future to bring him good news. He asks you, "How do I die?"

You reply with: "Surrounded by friends."

I'm starting to wish my grass was emo.

Why?

So it would cut itself.

There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.