Joke jokes

What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Their dad didn't come back with the milk.

A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, "WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!" A man in the back responds, "YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!"

Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell "yo mama" jokes.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?

Fitting in.

Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.

What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?

One of them knows the definition of no.

What do you call a pregnant slave? Buy one get one free.

best friend makes 9/11 joke.

you: "hey, my dad was inside the tower."

best friend: "I'm sorry."

you: "I always knew he was a great pilot."

What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.

What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!

What starts with M and ends with arriage?

Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?

Neither does the child.

Stephen Hawking's death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.

What's a depressed person's favorite drink?

Depresso espresso.

Nah, just kidding, it's bleach.

I’m not saying you’re going bald, but you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.

A priest, Kelly Clarkson, and Ian Watkins all walk into a bar... only for the bartender to exclaim, "We don't serve your kind around here!" Then he muttered in a low voice, "Fucking paedos."

Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?

A: Wanna hang out?

Do gay midgets come out of the cabinet?

A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."

My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."

Me: Knock knock.

Friend: Who's there?

Me: I don't know anymore.