Joke jokes

What do you call a pregnant slave? Buy one get one free.

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie talkie? He can’t walkie or talkie.

Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Their dad didn't come back with the milk.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?

Fitting in.

I’m not saying you’re going bald, but you’ll find Waldo before you find your hairline.

Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell "yo mama" jokes.

best friend makes 9/11 joke.

you: "hey, my dad was inside the tower."

best friend: "I'm sorry."

you: "I always knew he was a great pilot."

Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.

What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.

What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!

Stephen Hawking's death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.

Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?

A: Wanna hang out?

What's a depressed person's favorite drink?

Depresso espresso.

Nah, just kidding, it's bleach.

Do gay midgets come out of the cabinet?

A priest, Kelly Clarkson, and Ian Watkins all walk into a bar... only for the bartender to exclaim, "We don't serve your kind around here!" Then he muttered in a low voice, "Fucking paedos."

What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?

One of them knows the definition of no.

A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."

My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."

There was a kidnapping at school.

Don't worry, he woke up.

Me: Knock knock.

Friend: Who's there?

Me: I don't know anymore.

How do you get an emo out of a tree?

Cut the rope.