Joke

Joke jokes

Two pencils walking down the street.

Which one hasn’t got AIDS?

The one with the rubber on.

It's okay to tell a Stephen Hawking joke if there are stairs in your house he can't get to you. Plus, he shut himself down, so it's all good :)

Why did half the world go to hell? Because they were laughing at morbid jokes.

YOU'VE BEEN WARNED (again)!

Friend: *hits head* Others: How many fingers am I holding up? Me to friend: How suicidal am I on a scale from one to ten? Friend: Ten Me: He's fine guys.

Did you hear about the flood at the circus? Lots of people drowned, and there were two clowns that survived and two nuns still in the audience.

The two clowns ran over to the two nuns, and each one put a nun on his shoulder. Then they waded out of the big top, up to their waists in the rapid, turbulent water. As they were reaching dry land, one clown said to the other, "If you ask me, this is virgin on the ridiculous!"

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  • What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot? Bigfoot has been sighted.

    A father is talking to his three kids.

    Kid 1: Why is my name Rose?

    Dad: Because when you were a kid, a rose fell on your head.

    Kid 2: Why is my name Lily?

    Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby.

    Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh!

    Dad: Oh hey, Brick.

    I saw some toilet paper rolls rolling in the wind.

    So I called, "Toilet Papers Rolling In!"