Joke jokes
This isn't a joke, I repeat, this is not a joke. The plane in Lake Harriet is not in the lake. It is invisible because of the satellite pic, so there's no plane in Lake Harriet.
Why did the ground crack? Because of your mum!
Parents: Let's have a bonfire.
Me: Let's go to the orphanage.
Parents: To bring other children?
Me: No, to have the fire.
Parents: Won't they be missed?
Me: No, because there is nobody to miss them.
What is tall when it's young but short when it's old?
A candle or a pencil!
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
What's a word that starts with "m" and ends in "airage" and all men like it?
Miscarriage. The joke never gets old just like the baby.
What is an orphan's favorite website? Zillow.
I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.
So when my parents say no to "isms," I say, "Can I be homophobic?"
Why is six so scared? Because seven eight nine! 😂
What is cheetah's favorite taste to run fast?
Cheetah outta here!
What is another name 🤔 for Holy water 💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧 💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧 🚽 toilet water.
My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔
Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.
What hit the floor first, the kid or the feather?
The feather.
The rope stopped the kid.
Who killed Hitler goes to Heaven.
*looks up*
Oh, never mind.
What do you call a decapitated politician?
A severed head of state.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎
A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers, but there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them.
Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that, too. After a few hours, he gets the tux.
That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.
Prince might be with a new girl, but he still wants Gwen, who doesn't? Other half.
Gwen on the phone with Prince: Prince, stop sending me letters, poems, and memes through Gmail. We broke up, it's over!
Prince on the phone with Gwen: I know, but that new girl that I been seeing is not you! I miss you a lot! Please come back to me.
Gwen on the phone with Prince: I'm gonna hang up now!
Prince on the phone with Gwen: PLEASE DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gwen on the phone with Prince: Sorry, I can't hear you...you're breaking up...what?!
Prince on the phone with Gwen: Gwen! DO NOT HANG UP !!!!!!!!
Gwen on the phone with Prince: Okay...bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What did the doctor say to the Chinese patient? "Sum ting wong."