A boy and his friend were walking down the street.
Boy 1: "Bro, you still got my Nikes?"
Boy 2: "Yeah, sorry. I got them dirty."
Boy 1: "Please clean them, we have school tomorrow."
Boy 2 got back to his house and decided to clean his friend's shoes. After he finished drying them, he got stuck in his painfully small dryer. Then he remembered his brother needed something from the dryer. So he tried to get out, when his brother came in.
He came in twice.
(like if u understand)
Little Sally found out that she had hair on her private area and went up to her mom and asked, "Mom, I have hair on my privates, what is it?"
"Oh honey, that's your monkey," the mom says.
So little Sally runs up to her big sister and says, "My monkey has hair on it!" So the sister replies with a laugh, "You think that's cool? My monkey is already eating bananas!"
Like this joke. Ur mom.
Not totally a joke but... What do all these rape joke naysayers have in common with rapists? They are also forcing themselves on others.
Why did the orphan sleep outside? ... Because he gets to wake up to Mother Nature.
One day, Little Johnny needs to use the bathroom. His mom is in there, so he went in to use it and asked his mom, "What is that between your legs?"
His mom told him that is her bush. Then the next day the same thing happened, but with his dad. He asked his dad, "What is that between his legs?" He said, "My snake."
The same thing happened one more time, except with his grandmother. Little Johnny asked grandma what is on her chest. She said, "My headlights."
One night, Little Johnny caught his parents doing something naughty. Then he said, "Grandma, grandma, turn on your headlights! Daddy's snake is trying to get into mommy's bush!"
One day little Jonny is in class. It is the second day back to school. The teacher is annoyed with the kids, so she goes to the front of the class and says, "If you think you are stupid, stand up." Little Jonny stood up.
The teacher asked him, "Why do you think you're stupid?" Little Jonny said, "I don't think I am stupid."
Then the teacher asked little Jonny why he stood up. Then little Jonny replied, "I just felt bad seeing you standing here alone."
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."
"White beta males and fake alpha males are a joke that goes for POC men too."
Feminists are a joke.
Non-binary is a joke.
Remember what one of my gay friends told me: it's only cannibalism if you swallow.
What do Americans call high school?
A shooting range.
How does the earth rate its sex?
Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.
If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!
What's the difference between pizza deliveries and the Twin Towers?
Pizza deliveries get their orders right.
Why can’t orphans have dad jokes? Because they don’t got one.
What is the difference between a frog and a trombone player?
The frog might be on his way to a gig!
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:
I got it from her when I was born.
