Joke jokes
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
Your face.
What do you get if you add "ER" onto Hamburg?
Hamburg-ER.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Meals on wheels.
Of course Jesus wasn't a virgin! He obviously liked being nailed!
Then: You want free candy?
Now: You want free Wi-Fi?
Why did Sally not save the mountain climber?
Because it was her dad.
There once was a little girl named Sarah with no arms and legs.
*knock knock*
Who's there!
Not Sarah.
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail?
There is a small medium at large.
Have you ever been eight before?
You were between 7 and 9.
I fucked a Pokemon the other day. It is dead now.
What do you call a dictatorial cow?
Moosilini.
What do you call a black man on the moon?
An astronaut.
A very rich and famous comedian walked into a Russian bar and asked for a vodka, but the bar man (a big fan of his) answered to him: - "This vodka isn't good enough for you." - "If it is good enough for you it is good enough for me!"
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
Bigfoot is just a normal person who covered himself in Pritt Stick and went down on Susan Boyle.
Why do people shake cigarette boxes?
To wake up the cancer.
I'm so gay I could barely think straight.