A very rich and famous comedian walked into a Russian bar and asked for a vodka, but the bar man (a big fan of his) answered to him: - "This vodka isn't good enough for you." - "If it is good enough for you it is good enough for me!"
Joke Jokes
What did the pedophile say to the nutcracker?
"Aren't you a little too young to be doing that?"
Bigfoot is just a normal person who covered himself in Pritt Stick and went down on Susan Boyle.
Why do people shake cigarette boxes?
To wake up the cancer.
I'm so gay I could barely think straight.
What shoes does a pedophile wear?
White vans.
"Koalafications" are irr-elephant.
What do you call Link when he is hurt?
A link to the cast.
Why did the man walk into a bar?
Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!
What ended in 1999? 1998.
Yo momma's so stupid, she took a shower for 20 minutes after she heard a DIRTY JOKE!
Chuck Norris doesn't zoom out; everything moves backwards.
This one time I said that John Cena looks like crap.
But I realized I can't see him. LOL!
This one time I said to a person that they are dry, then I was wet (ba dum tiss).
My bully said I have to shut up. I said, "Shut down" (ba dum tiss).
We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"
Why can't Sally swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock knock, "Who's there?", not Sally.
Where did Sally go when the bombs dropped?
Everywhere.
How did Reese eat her cereal? - Witherspoon!
What's the hardest part about being a paedophile?
Trying to fit in.
Yo mama so far that when she walks outside at 8 a.m., it becomes midnight all over again.
Cunt.