Joke jokes
Instead of the line, "This girl's on fire," my friend can relate to, "The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the f*ck out!"
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
Fun fact: this category of jokes is the MOST hated one by feminists.
Unless you force them the point.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
Guys, we should stop telling orphan jokes. Their parents will get mad. Oh...
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
Why was the cheese always so confident? Because it had such a "gouda" self-image.
What did the cheese say to itself in the mirror?
"Halloumi, who's the tastiest of them all?"
How do you organize a space party? You "planet" with some "cheddar" and "brie"-pare for launch!
Why did the cheese blush? Because it saw the salad dressing.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
Why did the cheese fail the test? It couldn't make the grade, curd.
Bro, I gotta tell you a joke.
Nevermind, it's too cheesy!
I asked my sister to say something.
She said, "No."
That's what I like to hear.
Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn!
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
Did you hear about the red and blue ships that collided? All the sailors were marooned.
Anonymous: This guy reads everyone's jokes, but why doesn't he answer his mom?
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.