it's jokes
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
When the phone is ringing, Dad says, "If it's for me, don't answer it."
If you are on here, don’t hate. There will be rude ones, but it doesn’t matter.
Why did the skeleton run away from the crime scene?
He didn't have the guts to see it.
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit.
I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm. She said, "Is it because I warned him when hotness came?" I said, "No, you don’t shut up!"
Question: How did the cat cross the river?
Answer: It didn’t, it drowned.
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.
I wondered why the pitcher hadn’t pitched the ball yet.
Then it hit me.
Why didn’t Steven Hawking go to heaven? Because it was a stairway, not a rampway.
I’m reading a book on antigravity right now.
It’s impossible to put down.
What's 9 divided by 11?
Well, I know it's less than two alright!
Yo mama so fat even Dora can't explore it.
Wanna hear a joke about measurement... never mind, it would take too long.
One day I had the munchies, so I ate a clock. It was very... time consuming.
A guy was annoyed in a store. I walk up to him and said, "What's wrong, buddy? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned isle!"
Why do orphans get the small sized chip bags?
Because they don’t have a family to share it with. 😥
Want to hear a joke about a guy losing fingers?
Never mind, it’s too pointless.
When it's cold outside, men can cut ice in three places.