it's jokes

Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...

How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?

It never gets old.

Did you hear about that new emo pizza? It cuts itself!

Why did Mars turn permanently red? Because it saw Uranus.

Don't believe what your school bully tells you.

Always take it with a grain of assault.

How many orphans does it take to change a light bulb?

Obviously more than three because my basement is still dark.

Abortion is becoming more and more expensive these days. So visit Ammu-nation and pick up an Armsan RS-X1 tactical shotgun. It comes with a free box of ammo and a three year warranty. Buy now, pay later.

How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.

Maybe if the grass on my front lawn had depression, It would cut itself.

Many were curious about how methane ended up on Mars.

I'm pretty sure it was because of Uranus.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they all beat the room for being black.

Have you seen the inside of Ford's Theatre? It will blow your mind. ~Abraham Lincoln

Life is like a penis.

Women make it hard.

Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"

Because it doesn't matter your age.

Teacher: What’s the closest planet?

Kids yell: Sun.

Except for one.

Other kid: Uranus.

Teacher: Uranus?

Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.

A man ate a glue stick. It tasted bad. He died. Hahahahah!

I made a website about orphans.

It didn’t have a home page!

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and called it "Hot Wheels."

Vape company: Hey, want some lung cancer and a nicotine addiction?

Teens: NO WAY!

Vape company: But it’s mango flavored!

Teens: O OK. 😤

When does a joke become a dad joke?

When it becomes apparent!