it's jokes

Ghost

32 views ·

There's a white guy, black guy, and Santa Claus. They get a hotel room.

White guy goes in room first and sees money on the table and he picks it up. A ghost appears and says, "Put down my money or I'll cut off your weiner." He gets scared and jumps out the window.

Black guy goes in the room, sees the money and picks it up. Ghost appears and says, "Put down my money or I'll cut off you're weiner." He gets scared and jumps out the window.

Santa Claus goes in the room sees the money and picks it up. Ghost appears, "Put down my money or I'll cut off you're weiner." Santa Claus looks at the ghost and says "I'm the ghost of Christmas past, you touch my dick I'll kick your ass!"

Snow

2 views ·

Snover1: You can't pass through Snow Way!

Squirtle: Why can't I pass through Snow Way?

Snover1: There's snow in the way.

Snover2: Yeah, you can't get past through the snow while it's on the way, to continuous.

Squirtle: What? There's snow in here the whole time. What is this? Snow Society?!

"AAAAARRRGGH!!"

Squirtle: Who is that?

Snover2: That is Snow.

Squirtle: What?! That giant snow tree thing is Abomasnow!

Snover2: Oops! Don't be a Halt!

"Haaaaaaaaallllltttt!!!"

"Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!"

Snovers: That was a JOKE, Squirtle be FROZEN, just let it go, let it go!

Cancer

64 views ·

There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: "Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have! You don't have it because you are poor!" The poor child answers: "You're right, it's very nice, but I have one thing that you don't have!" The rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline, and all the other games that can be done outdoors and says to the poor child: "Look at that beautiful swimming pool I have! It is very big; you don't have it because you are poor!" And the poor child says: "Beautiful, it is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have." So the rich child feels bad. He says: "Wait, but I'm rich! How is it possible? I have everything I want because I'm rich. Why do you have something that I don't have?" And the poor child says: "I have cancer!"

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  • Abortion

    71 views ·

    When a woman decides to abort, it is called a decision, but when I run my truck into a playground of kids, it is called murder.

    Pokemon

    16 views ·

    POKEMON THEME SONG JOKE: I wanna be the berry best, like no one ever was.

    To bitch them is my real pest, to brain them in my toss. I will gravel across the land, perching war and wide. Fuse Pokemon to under-strand, the lower that's in psyche.

    Poke him on! Gotta joke them all it's Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you're my pest friend, In a world you must de-blend, Poke him on!

    Gotta joke them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!!

    Gotta joke them all, Gotta joke them all!

    Poke him on!

    Blog

    11 views ·

    Hi guys, so today I have not thought of a joke, and I'm not really sure what to do, so I thought I would do kinda a blog sort of thing, so hope you enjoy, and you don't have to read this!

    So I woke up this morning and heard this weird noise, and it was my dad building me a new gymnastics bar so I can have uneven bars, which I am so excited about! And I am so glad that you guys have been nice and liking my jokes and stuff, but also, make sure to comment below if you want to tell me what kind of jokes you want and what you want me to do, and also, feel free to talk to me! Love y'all!!!

    Suicide

    8 views ·

    Hi guys, I have a brain teaser for you! Leave it in the comment section if you figure it out. Here you go!

    If you kill yourself (suicide which is technically murder), will you go to Heaven or Hell? Because you murdered yourself, but what if you were a Christian?

    That was my brain teaser for you guys! Make sure you leave what you came up with for the answer in the comment section below!! PEACE OUT!!!! :)

    Plane

    37 views ·

    On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class.

    On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.

    Priest

    87 views ·

    There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.

    The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"

    The teacher said, "What about the kids?"

    The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."

    The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"

    Rainbow

    9 views ·

    What's the difference between Jesus and a gay person?

    One created the rainbow, the other one ruined it.

    Bullshit

    53 views ·

    If a girl jumps off a cliff, some people call it suicide and some call it girl power, but I call it BULLSHIT.

    Submarine

    76 views ·

    What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?

    Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."

    Muffin

    There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"

    The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

    Fart

    9 views ·

    So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.

    My dad starts laughing at me.

    Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”

    Me: “Why dad?”

    Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”

    Emo

    2 views ·

    I went to the store the other day and scanned an emo's arm.

    It gave me a discount!

    Meat

    10 views ·

    Why is it okay to stab meat, but I can't stab myself? These woke lefties, BLM, Antifa, feminists, eco-warriors, pro-vaccine libtards are stopping your freedom and right to stab yourself!

    Porn

    283 views ·

    My wife and I’s gay marriage counselor advised us to watch porn together. So, we decided to try it out one day and search up lesbian shemale porn.

    And that’s the day she found out she was a porn star.