it's jokes
Neona (😟): I bet you I'm not going to get that job at all!
Gwen (😌): Yeah well, I believe in you.
Neona (😔): You got the job, and am I still waiting for them to call me and remind me that I will, but I won't get it. Anyway, I need to prepare for a job that I won't get.
Gwen (😠): Neona, you just don't got enough confidence. You got to have confidence in life. I know you will get the job. I do now. Just believe instead of giving up!
Neona (😞): UGH fine!!!
Gwen (😉): I'll see you at that job interview!!!! Put a smile on your face, too!
Neona (😊): Okay...Gwen, you're the best!
So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well. There's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.
I'm scared that it moves at night.
I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my eye off it.
I was going to charge my phone, so I pulled a plug and put it in. Then, my grandpa wasn't breathing anymore.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's headstone?
Roll In Peace.
The doctor said I have until 2:30 to live.
That’s like 20 years from now, I said.
He looks at the time. It’s 2:30.
It's too long, sorry. >:)
It's okay if you miss while saying "Kobe" because he didn't make it either.
How can you find out how old a cabbage is?
By looking at its cabbAGE.
Watersharky Music Productions Presents As It Was by Harry Styles.
Holdin' me back Gravity's holdin' me back I want you to hold out the palm of your hand Why don't we leave it at that?
Nothin' to say When everything gets in the way Seems you cannot be replaced And I'm the one who will stay, oh-oh-oh
In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was As it was, as it was You know it's not the same
Answer the phone "Harry, you're no good alone Why are you sitting at home on the floor? What kind of pills are you on?"
Ringin' the bell And nobody's coming to help Your daddy lives by himself He just wants to know that you're well, oh-oh-oh
In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was In this world, it's just us You know it's not the same as it was As it was, as it was You know it's not the same
Go home, get ahead, light-speed internet I don't wanna talk about the way that it was Leave America, two kids follow her I don't wanna talk about who's doin' it first.
Is it far enough? We publish interviews with people who know a lot about real wars.
Peace: On one case, that's true, but violence is the slogan for it.
Socialism: Yes, morning and evening. So the Sorce Streftator's work must be stopped!
Maoist: Yes, I like Walken Engspert.
Anarchist: Claire, this is why we don't need democracy, I'm Das Zoe Melsen.
Capitalism: Yes, but the truth is that he is ignorant and cannot be considered as an old leader, but as an employee.
Governor: Yes, but a strong left should be as strong as Minister Janomen Vardan or Director Januso Gavrelic.
Patriots: Are there simple megalithic laws?
"Talking Ben killed me. JK, it was talking me."
I was on a website doing homework, and there was this funny a** commercial banner saying: "Eat a bag of Dick's!" It was the funniest sh*t ever!
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!
I like it when your mom keeps on top of things.
(Male fantasy)
Yeah, on top of me on the living room carpet, snogging my face off.
Why did the skydiver's parachute fail?
Because it realized it had a better chance of survival without them.
I just found out that one of the new Star Wars shows is going to be about the time that some malware overloaded all of their computers, and I can tell from the title that those computers use Windows!
It's called "The Bad Batch File!"
"Stand up for yourself! Oh, come on, walk it off."
What did the shark say when it ate the clownfish?
It tasted funny!
Why was ten scared?
It was in the middle of 9/11.
What did Henry VIII say when he was asked to review Six the Musical?
"It was okay, but I really think they could have cut a few parts."