it's jokes

How do Mexicans feel about Trump's wall? -- They'll get over it.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? -- Just Juan.

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?

Why didn't anyone react when the king farted? -- It was a noble gas.

Why don't you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it.

Two silk worms got in a fight. It ended in a tie.

Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.

Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you?

A pool table.

How does Moses prepare his tea? -- Hebrews it.

I once ate a watch. It was time consuming.

I just found out I'm colorblind. It came out of the yellow.

A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, "Do you have that book for men with small penises?"

The librarian looks on her computer and says, "I don't know if it's in yet."

"Yeah, that's the one!"

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?

It was given two consecutive sentences.

I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.

Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.

I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. I can't wait to see his face light up when he opens it.

I love the smell of my F5 key. It's very refreshing.

I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.

I now have $999,999.75.

My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic. But if I'm going to have sex, it's going to be on my own Accord.