it's jokes

Worm

23 views ·

Time for a Terraria joke.

What is a worm called when it is with a rich worm for his money?

A gold digger.

(play the game or watch some vids to understand)

Tree

1 view ·

It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.

Most foresters have a wooden personality.

Diss track

9 views ·

It was 2017, and lots of people were hating RiceGum because he released "Frick Da Police," a diss track insulting Idubbbz's Content Cop video on RiceGum.

A few hours after the diss track was released, someone went to Rice's house and spray painted "Asian Jake Paul" on the wall of the front of his house.

Rice went to "meet" Idubbbz, then he saw the graffiti.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE?"

Hours later, police found 4 suspects.

"Explain."

Sus 1: I don't vandalize.

Sus 2: I was staying indoors because it was rainy.

Sus 3: I fucking hate RiceGum, but I would not ruin his cheap ass house lol.

Sus 4: I eat bricks.

Police: I know who.

RiceGum: Who?

Police: ITS-

807907070707007607865909685780970695067586708650968095768076895708769875660980765970659062870907965607867856067586908

Notice anything in the number crowd?

Comment the answer below and I will see who is correct.

Child

9 views ·

What's the difference between a child and a book?

One doesn't scream when you snap its neck.

Pizza

A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.

I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...

Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?

Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.

Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!

Me: You can't kick me out.

Manager: Why not? Huh?

Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.

Pornography

114 views ·

It was pornography class, and there was a break.

Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...

Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!

Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?

Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...

Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Teacher: Where's the D?

Adult 2: Inside me...

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  • Snack

    42 views ·

    J0K35 (me): So I heard China recently released a snack.

    Guy: Oh, what is it?

    J0K35: They call it the Asian Raisin.

    Guy: Isn't that what RiceGum was when he released Frick da police?

    Pencil

    504 views ·

    Little Johnny was sitting in class, and he was behind a girl called Sally. The teacher asks the class, "Who created the Earth?" And Little Johnny pokes Sally in the back with his sharpened pencil, and she jumps and says, "MY GOD!" And the teacher says, "Yes, Sally, God did create the Earth." Sally sits down.

    Then, the teacher asks, "Where do you go after you live a good life?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally again, and she jumps up and says, "HEAVENS TO BETSY!" And the teacher says, "Yes Sally. You will go to heaven after you live a good life." Sally sits down, knowing full well Little Johnny was poking her. Sally gave Little Johnny an angry glare, and she turns around.

    And then, the teacher asks the class, "What did Eve say to Adam after their 77th child?" and Little Johnny pokes Sally HARDER this time in the back, and Sally jumps, turns around and says, "If you stick that thing in me one more time, I swear I'm gonna lose it!" And the teacher faints.

    Feminist

    9 views ·

    There is a feminist group in my town.

    It is called Gal-Qaeda.

    (I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)

    Poop

    2 views ·

    "Kaka" means poop so... use "kaka" in your jokes rather than "poop." It is more funny. KAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAAKAK

    Baby

    1 view ·

    How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.

    Asthma

    4 views ·

    Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."

    Gym Teacher: "That's alright."

    Other Kid: "Hush!"

    Music

    Me: *listening to music under a tree and smiling*

    Random person who sees me: Awwww look at him, he looks so so happy ^w^

    Me: *actually listening to depressing music that makes me wanna kill and end myself but just smiles to show that everything's gonna be fine even if it won't*

    Uranus

    78 views ·

    Patient to doctor: "Will I be ok, Doc?"

    Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus now."

    Patient: "I don't do that astrology stuff."

    Doctor: "Nor me. My thermometer just broke."