IT jokes
I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.
I read a sign. What it meant to say is, "You matter, don't give up." What I read was, "You don't matter, give up."
Your mama is so fat that when she ate a burger, she liked it.
I tried to search stuff about 9/11 for a research project, but it didn’t work... I guess the site crashed.
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
Why do Native Americans hate snow?
Because it's white and all over their land.
What does a pumpkin need when it's hurt? A pumpkin patch.
What do you never say to gay people?
IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS! 🤣🤣🤣🏳️🌈
Egg shaped, dome, bowling ball lookin' ass, bald fuck with that 360 degrees ahh head, motherfucker look like a damn balloon.
Call me Kobe 'cause I'm finna use your head as a basketball and throw it at yo' parents. Mr. Clean, bootleg Saitama lookin' ass mfer. No hair? :(
Why [doesn't] Hollywood make a good movie about holocausts?
Because it's so hard to skin Jewish characters.
Why was ten scared? Because it was between 9/11.
I'd tell a 9/11 joke, but it would crash and burn.
Your hairline is so expired, it’s more expired than your milk!
Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning?
Because unlike the Twin Towers, it can dodge!
Yo mama is so fat when she stepped on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Guy: You won't eat a human, so why do you eat meat?
Other Guy: It is bold of you to think I won't eat a human.
What do us emos all have in common?
Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably go up in flames.
Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.