IT jokes

A Chinese guy said to his friend: "I saw you fucking your donkey yesterday."

His friend: "No, that's impossible, it's too hot inside."

What goes cackle, cackle, *bonk*?

A witch laughing its head off.

Teacher: Hi class, today we will learn about the song, "London Bridge is falling down, falling down."

Then one student said, "I thought it was 'Twin Towers are falling down, falling down!'"

Did you hear about that musical that was sung by some obsidian?

It rocked!

I'm surprised that the tree is still standing when my emo friend is hanging from it.

Love that dress; it would look much better on my floor, though.

I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.

Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing!

I made a website for orphans; it does not have home pages, though.

How many children does it take to change a lightbulb?

Not 15, as my basement's still dark.

I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...

Is that a person over there?

Na, it's Jesus.

Is that my student?

Na! It is Jesus!

I overdosed on Viagra yesterday.

It was the hardest day of my life.

I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.

Your hairline goes so far back that it had dinner with Jesus.

Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.

This year I'm going to name my Christmas tree Amy Winehouse, because when it dies it will leave needles all over the living room.

A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.

A guy and his girl just finished making love.

Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"

The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"