IT jokes
How do you get a koala to die? Kill it.
Why did the towers fall? Because someone in Call of Duty hijacked the planes and crashed them into it.
Is it me, or was 9/11 too plane? I thought it would be more exciting.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
I have returned. Anyways, what do you call it when you're actually in Panera Bread, being in Panera Bread?
The doctor said I would make it, but then Spider-Man came in holding a PS5.
Most orphans were born on the highway. It’s where most accidents [happen].
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.
I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’
I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’
I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day.
It was impossible to put down.
I shouted at a kid. I told him to get his parents.
It was the last time I worked at an orphanage, 🤣.
Why did the gay man get raped?
He assed for it.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 80 mph? Its butt.
Old people kept saying "you're next" to me at weddings, so I started saying it to them at funerals.
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
It has been rumored that Disney is developing a movie based on suicide. The title?
Finding Emo.
My pp was in the Guinness World Record book.
The librarian then asked me to take it out.
What's the similarity between your money and your life?
It just keeps going down.
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?