COVID-19 is like pasta.
Asians invented it, Italians spread it.
"We've invented the spade!"
"Oh wow, this is ground-breaking!"
It's important to wash your sex toys.
That's why priests invented baptism.
Which one of Lord Arthur's knights invented the round table?
Sir Cumference.
For one of the most highly regarded minds on the planet, it is a shame he could not create a longer-lasting battery.
How did Stephen Hawking make it up the stairway to heaven?
Well, he didn’t; they invented an elevator.
Yo mama's so fat, she invented double doors!
Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?
Did you know about the guy who invented knock knock jokes?
He won the no-Bell prize.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
The chicken wasn’t invented then.
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist?
Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older.
|| 20 YEARS LATER ||
Johnny: Mom, now can you tell me why cuss words exist?
Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them.
Johnny: Damn, Mom, you shoulda told me that when I was still seven 'cause now I really feel like that person.
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
The inventor of the umbrella was just going to call it "brella," but he hesitated.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8.
You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.
Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
Because he wanted to win no-bell prize!
Fun fact: Toasters were originally called tanning breads!
You should always wash your sex toys. That’s why priests invented baptism.
Aw hell naw,
dey turned Spongilebile in2 a frigin generator.
Of all the inventions of the last 100 years, the dry erase board has to be the most remarkable.
