Insult jokes

My friend: Yo stupid.

Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?

My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*

Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.

What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.

1, 2 you built like a dork.

3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.

What do my cock and money have in common?

Your mom.

Suck on my big fat ding dong, you idiot!

Political correctness has gone too far! You have to say "cognitive decline" rather than "Alzheimer's ridden shitbag"!

Hey, guy, you suck! Why do I suck? Because you're the one that's sucking juice out of a straw.

So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.

Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.

Anyways, she cried lol.

"Ur Mater."

Kill yourself, hoes!

Ur mom.

A girl said she liked dogs. I called her a bitch.

Yo forehead is so freaking big, but not bigger than my BBC. 😏

WATERSHARKY DISS TRACK - by Firesharky

You smell like you farted FARTED harded HARDED A B Honor Roll. All Fs, you r*tarded. OHHHH!

What do you say to someone's mom?

"You mom gay."

Me: Hey you trashy pig woman, go in the toilet or lay on the grass where you belong.

Trashy pig woman: Why?

Me: Because you smell like fart and you're pretty much just a turd with lips.

Me and your mom in the bed.

Your mom's asshole.

"Your mom gay.exe" has started working.

My life, your life, and your sister is a slut.