Insult

Insult jokes

Telephone

  • Cheer for fun on the telephone and singing, "We are family!" Even then, your dad, really, he's fat, just like your dad. And your mom's fat ass, b**** ass, looking like an Oompa Loompa self, looking like an ugly.

  • 1
  • Mom

  • What's the difference between your mom and a laundromat washer?

    The washer doesn't take loads for free.

  • 0
  • Democrat

  • You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.

    You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.

    You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.

  • 2
  • Face

  • Roses are red, violets are blue.

    My heart is dead because of you.

    Actually, not because of you... because of your face.

  • 1
  • Mom

  • Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.

    I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.

  • 0
  • Virgin

  • Comic: God, you're a fuckin' virgin, aren't you?!

    Gerald: No! I've been 'round the block loads of times; women practically drool over me.

    Comic: Yeah, and the Archbishop of Banterbury, mate. A name like Gerald, and with added 'four eyes' like them shit pair of glasses from FOUR EYED SPECCY INSTITUTION, mate, the only woman your dick has been in was when you were inside your mom's womb.

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