INS jokes

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

Me and my friend have a friend that's in a wheelchair, but he is so annoying, so we throw him in a fire. Now we call him "Hot Wheels."

Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?

Because they're the ones making the toys.

Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?

A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.

What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!

This is my fidget spinner, I got it in my Easter basket.

You'd think my son would be happy that Daddy bought him a new bike. But no... oh no, he just sits in his wheelchair and cries like a little girl.

What is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?

A frog in a blender.

Why do American guns only have 30 bullets?

'Cause that's how many kids are in a class.

Why was 10 afraid?

Because he was in the middle of 9 and 11.

Good afternoon. My name is Russell, and I am a wilderness explorer of Tribe 54, Sweat Lodge 12. Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?

Why is "T" well-respected, but more in its lowercase form?

It crossed the line with Jesus.

In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.

Sound familiar? 🤔

Well, in September 11th...

Why did the kid go in the guy's van?

Answer: He thought he was being adopted.

There is one good part about paedophiles... they go slow in school zones.

Your mama is so stupid, her phone died, so she buried it in the backyard!

What do math and me on P-hub have in common?

They are both hard.

I bought my sister a trampoline. She sat in her wheelchair and cried.

A girl and her brother are walking in their garden. POV: Brother. Sister: "Why are you cutting those flowers?"

Brother: "Because they're beautiful!"

Sister: "I thought you said you cut yourself because you aren't."

Brother:......

I once asked a sketchy man at a bar for some relationship advice. He simply replied, "They're all dead hookers once they're in the trunk."