INS jokes
Do you remember blowing bubbles when you were younger?
Well, Bubbles is back in town and was asking about you!
My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
It smells like something died in my room, oh yeah, it's my dignity, hope, and my feeling. Put in the corner of my room, they make a decent blanket to wipe my tears.
I got in an argument with the 90-degree angle. And guess what? It was right!
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂
I've reached the age where looking in the mirror is like checking the news. I know there'll be some new developments I won't like.
Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
Yo mama so old, her photos are in a museum and her friends are in a graveyard.
Do you like In-N-Out?
Yes, why? In and out of your mouth.
What do eating a watermelon, rolling a cigarette, and eating a hippie chick out have in common?
Spit, spit, spit!
Why could you not see the guy in my dark closet?
The guy was black.
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.