INS jokes
Two fish in a bowl. First fish asks, "Haven't I seen you around here before?"
The second fish replies, "F**k me, a talking fish!"
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a boogie in it!
"Knock knock."
"Come in."
A man walks into a bar. The corrections officer says, "Usually we open the cell before you go in, now stop bleeding on my floor!"
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
Hollow Knight Meme
What's worse than 5 babies in a dumpster?
5 dumpsters in a baby.
Yo mama so stupid, she starved in a grocery store!
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.
But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.
What competition do nuts participate in?
The peanut butter cup.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.
What's the slowest train in the world? A slow coach!
When you are sitting outside at school and this boy comes up to you with a rock in his hand and says, "Do you know where Mrs. Stewart is at?"
You have to tell this to a friend:
There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10
Did you know emo kids are the highest jumpers in the world? Some are still up there!
Two gays are getting ready for Christmas... They are expecting a big package in the mail!
Where's your mom?
In the bin.