INS jokes
What do James Doyle and Hannah Doyle have in common?
John fucked them both in the rear.
How do you get a million Pikachus in a bus?
You shove them on!
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
My mom said, "You are in big trouble!"
I said, "Are you going to punish me?"
We have some leak in the fridge. I'm surprised nobody has called a plumber.
Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
Say what you want about Hitler, but in the end, he did kill Hitler.
What do your teacher and your friend have in common?
They will both die eventually.
Why do they have fences around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
1979: I bet there will be "flying cars" in "the future."
2019: The flying cars future.
What is red, pink, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
What is green, brown, and goes round and round?
The same baby 3 weeks later.
A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone that knows you.
Every time you feel lucky to have your mother in your life, what should you tell her?
I really hit the mother lode with you!
"Did you hear about the worst zoo in the world? It only had one dog in it. It was a Shih Tzu."
American people: We will throw your teabags in the ocean!
British: At least our towers didn’t fall. 😎
Why was 10 scared?
Because it was in the middle of 9 and 11.
What is the difference between an orphan and a blanket?
One is actually used.
Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
What did one orphan say to another orphan?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"