INS jokes

I got in trouble at school today because I played the knife game with a pair of scissors, but I couldn't flip them off because I was missing that finger.

There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.

Girl, you are so ugly that when you look in the mirror, it shatters, more than your relationship.

What do you call a kid in a wheelchair?

TIMMAHHHH!

How do you confuse a blonde?

Tell them to stand in the corner in a round room.

Do you know why there is no “f” in “orphan?”

Because it stands for family.

Yo momma's so poor, she chases a garbage truck with a grocery list in her hand.

Hang in there, you all, Literally.

I got a job at a library. I got fired after 15 minutes. They told me it was because I put women's rights in the fiction section.

Yo mama's so ugly, even the kid in the wheelchair ran.

What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?

They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.

The only letters in the alphabet that you know are "KFC."

If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?

The Royal Commission.

Alternatively, Tony Abbott.

You're so poor you put paper cutlery in the dishwasher.

Your forehead is so big when you walk by I can't see what's in front of me.

My friend just told me about reverse exorcisms.

In these, the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Half of it. 🐛

What do the Twin Towers and my Mom have in common? They both went down on my dad.

Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?

Yeah, it went on and on.

What did the talking rope say to the man?

"Just hang in there."