INS jokes
Have you heard of the current event in Africa?
It’s known as the Hunger Games.
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
I broke my arm in two places. You know what the doctor told me? Stay out of those places!
What does Diana stand for?
Died In A Nasty Accident.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
What’s a foot on one end, a foot on the other end, and a foot in the middle?
A meter stick.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'
A bicurious man goes to a gay bar.
A gay man offers him a drink.
The bi man explains he doesn't know if he's gay or not.
"That's fine," he says, "let's just have a drink."
The gay man asks him for a dance, and he explains again he isn't sure if he's gay or not.
Eventually, the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends.
They get to his house, and the gay man says, "Do you fancy having sex?"
He isn't sure, so the gay man explains, "I'll push in slow, and at any point you want to stop, make animal sounds, and if you like it, start singing."
So they get to it, and the gay man pushes in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR"
I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.
But I can break yours today, hopefully.
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
They should bring Michael Jackson back from the dead so he can star in the Peter Pan horror movie.
"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."
- Charlie Chaplin
Guess what, everybody? I'm dumb in math. I'm dumb and stupid at math.
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
They both used to be straight.
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.
One time in the butt. Two times in the butt. Three times in the butt makes a slut hot and wet.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.
Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.