INS jokes
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.
I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣
I recently learned that it's politically incorrect to talk about taking part in a school shooting.
Apparently the term "school photos" is more acceptable.
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.
My girlfriend died in Tokyo during a tsunami. I was sad, but my friend told me, "Don't worry, there are plenty more in the ocean."
There are only 2 things I hate in this world:
1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.
How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?
Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.
They should bring Michael Jackson back from the dead so he can star in the Peter Pan horror movie.
My dick was in the book of world records.
But then the librarian asked me to take it out.
The population in Ireland's capital started rapidly growing. In fact, it's Dublin!
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said, "a smile."
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay.
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school.
Going to school is mandatory in this country.
Can you guess my plan?
What do White Castle sliders and Michael Jackson have in common? They have their meat in tiny wet buns.
Help, my ADHD is so bad that not even I can focus in a concentration camp.
What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?
They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
If a deaf kid swears in sign language, does his mom wash his hands with soap?
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
I asked my mom what is dark humor. She said "see them boy over there in the wheelchair, ask him to walk." I said, "but I’m blind." She responded, "Exactly."
If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.