Ingredient jokes
Daughter: Mommy?
Mom: Hey.
Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?
Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.
Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...
What flavor do you buy an orphan?
Self raising.
What’s the hardest part about making vegetable soup?
To put the wheelchair in the pot.
What do mermaids put in the salads?
Sea cucumber.
What is the spiciest meat ever? Pepperoni.
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.
Arby's fast food and abortion clinic: Your dead babies are our taters and gravy.
Community talk
Guys, I know this is crazy lady talk, but please just bare with me. I'm worried I obviously believe in some very conterversal things, so just yeah wtvr.
Witches and spiritual people all over have agreed that they have a bad or off feeling. Like the feeling you get when something bad is going to happen, something big. Not all, but so fucking many. Theres this person, she made what she called a "Justice jar" for peo… Read more
Typically, the base for lean is a strong prescription cold medicine, specifically cough syrup that contains both promethazine and codeine. Other preparations use codeine/guaifenasin, hydrocodone/chlorphenamine, hydrocodone/APAP, and hydrocodone/homatropine. Over-the-counter cold medicines that contain dextromethorphan (often paired with guaifenasin or acetaminophen) as the active ingredient have also been used, as th… Read more
I put NaCl on my food.