I fucking love rhubarbs.
What’s an orphan’s favorite snake, self raising flour?
What flavor do you buy an orphan?
Self raising.
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."
A peanut and another peanut walk into a bar.
One was a salted peanut.
What's your favorite type of flour?
Don't know.
Mines self-raising.
McNeill's mom wrote a shopping list for supper:
cabbage _50
Carrots-50
Cooking fat -100
Onions_20
Tomato-20
salt-10
Total=250
She gave McNeill the list to get the ingredients.
McNeill took long to return home from the shopping.
His mom decided to call McNeill to ask why are taking long. McNeill answered, "I have all the ingredients, but I'm looking for total."
Applesauce.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Condensed.
Condensed who?
Condensed milk.
Why does the egg crack? Cos it's sad.
What are the four seasons?
Salt, Pepper, Sugar, and Flour.
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
"Go get me the lamb sauce!"
My son asked me, “What is angel cake made of?”
I reply by listing the ingredients in Mr. Kipling angel cakes. Then he shouts “STOP!” I stop as I reach food colorings. He slowly crawls towards me and says in a whisper, “Well, in my angel cake, I put angels in them.”
I freaked out about this, so I calmed down and asked who did you put in this angel cake. He said, “Grandma, the one who died last Saturday.”
I was baking a cake when I saw some egg shell in the mix. I said, "You've got to be yolking me!"
My diet consists of Blood Pudding, I love it and have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, my secret ingredient though?
It consists of the blood and insides of my victims, it’s a bit chunky sometimes, some bits chewy, some bits hard, but it’s a hearty meal.
What the can say to the tomato?
Tomato tomato potato potato find twelve recipe for the both 👍🏾
I put on ingredient sticker read for tasting good.
What is the spiciest meat ever? Pepperoni.
Hey guys, the prank for today is when I lied about feeling sick so I wouldn't have to go to school.
Introduction: This prank was committed a week ago! Around 5:00 a.m. in the morning!
1. I got out some eggs, milk, salt, and a little bit of mashed olives... well those are the main ingredients.
2. I mixed it all up for about 2 mins just to make it look really like barf...no going to school today!
3. I put it under the sofa just to give it some solid scent to it.
4. I fixed my breakfast eggs and bacon. Then when my mom comes down I...PULL OUT MY FAKE BARF!!!!! News flash make a fake excuse for her to leave! My excuse is "I need something its in my room I don't want to get cause it would waste time".
She fell for it. Then I pull out my FAKE barf which looks like real barf. Then you say or I said "Mom I don't feel so good"! News flash: Don't over sell it think about all that boring school work! and guess what she fell for it so I spend all day doing nothing...absolutely nothing!
Well that's the prank. Anymore pranks you want ask me in the comment section! Byeeeeeeeeeee
